The Redneck Test (All the cool kids are doing it

1. Have you ever been muddin’? Yes, as recently as two years ago.

2. Have you ever been on a dirt/gravel road? Well yeah. (Dumb)

3. Ever been swimmin’ at the river? Oh yes. Love swimming in the river. We used to live on the bank of one, and after work in the summer, we'd take a six pack down and wade out in the middle. There was a rock outcropping, and we'd sit there and drink beer.

4. Ever had a bonfire party? Sure.

5. Have you ever driven a tractor? Not a big one.

6. Have you ever been on a horse? Lots of times. We owned shetland ponies for years when I was a kid. In later years, we went trail riding with friends.

7. Call a kiss “sugar” (Gimme some sugar)? Nope. Never heard that til recently.

8. Get stuck, in a 4WD, in mud up to the windows? Not up to the windows, but we were stuck pretty good. Drunkbrook and I had to dig mud to get us out.

9. Do you say fixin’, reckon and ya’ll? Yes. Reckon not as much as y'all and fixin.

10. Ever done 90 mph down a dirt road? Yup.

11. Worked/Lived on a farm? Live on one now. Steers, goats, and mules across the road, corn/soybeans all around me. The mule was visiting my yard two weeks ago, hanging out eating grass.

12. Been to a rodeo? A couple.

13. Do you own cowboy boots? Several pair....the only high heels I wear.

14. Have you ever went rollin’ yard? What?

15. Have you ever said “git er done”? Only in mock.

16. Does your town have a “Drive A Tractor to School Day”? Uh no.

17. Have you ever had a party in a barn? Never had the party, but have attended a few.

18. Do you think tractors are sexy? Oh hell yes.

19. Ever rode a 4-wheeler? Yes, Mechanic Jack took me.

20. Are you from the country? Define country, but I'd have to say yes. It's more towny now though. Sad.

21. If so, are you proud of it? Well yeah!

22. Gone hunting? Nope. Unless shooting a pellet gun at groundhogs to scare them counts.

23. Gone fishing? I LOVE to fish. I'm teaching Obbie this summer.

24. Can you clog or have you been clogging? I wear clogs. Thats close enough for me.

25. Been on a hay ride? Oh my yes.

26. Have you ever line danced? Nope. At Gun point might be the only way.

27. Camped under the stars? Love it.

28. Ever been cow tippin’? No. If it's real, I think it's mean.

29. Ever owned a pick up truck? Nope. But I treat the wagon like a pickup.

30. Had a pig for a pet? No. Ponies, chickens, a squirrel, and cats & dogs.

31. Own a pair of overalls? I used to, but overalls aren't flattering on fat girls.

32. Pee’d on the side of the road? When you've gotta go, you've gotta go.

33. Made homemade wine? Sure. IN my first apartment, I made wine. And since then once or twice.

34. Had a party at the creek? Yup.

35. Milked a cow? Nope.

36. Ran across round bails of hay? They're everywhere around here, but to physically run on one, no.

37. Must have sweet tea? Blech. Hate it. Has to be unsweetened with one pack of blue stuff.

38. Been to a race? I sure have. Hagerstown Speedway, and many, many tractor pulls.

39. Drink fresh milk, straight from the dairy farm? Used to buy it from an Amish guy where Jack hunts. It's the best milk ever.

40. Include the word “yonder” in your vocabulary? Nope.